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Chapter IX - Into the Scarlet Monastery
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michellethemit



Joined: 10 Jan 2006
Posts: 129
Location: Stuck in a toilet somewhere

PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2007 6:18 pm    Post subject: Chapter IX - Into the Scarlet Monastery Reply with quote

His lipless mouth was pursed, and his blue scaly forehead was wrinkled.

He glanced over at me. “It sort of helps me not miss my home,” he said, “that my home isn’t there any more. Katy M arrived one day and told me pick up my things and follow her, and then a hundred years later everyone had left and there was no home for me to go back to.”

“I’m sorry,” I replied.

He looked back out over the waves, pursing his scaly lips. “I’m not,” he said. “Get some sleep.”


First you say 'lipless mouth' and then he's pursing his scaly lips? :O

((fixed, thanks -ed))

He was a broad-shouldered man, his yellow hair falling almost to his shoulders, and a yellow beard covered his face.

Isn't it usually 'blonde'?

((if it's a girl, yup! -ed))

ZOMG PRESTOR?!?!

“Right, but Katy M told me that after it almost got destroyed last time it’s just a big tree now.”

There seems to be a punctuation mark missing b/w 'last time' and 'it's'

Then, “Ah crap,”

Missing a comma.

((these are correct or intentional -ed))

there was a powerful, magical whirring,

Not so sure about that one, don't you usually italics onoma...damnit. Noises. Not -ing stuff?

((I did! didn't I? -ed))


Other than that...Holy crap. Update. And what a suspense filled update too!

So many more unanswered questions have been popped now, what with secrets b/w Fang and Horse and the purpose of the red book and ooh....boy.
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Amaunator



Joined: 03 Dec 2005
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Location: Belgium ... innocuous but intrepid!

PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2007 7:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You noticed the Prestor thing too? Very Happy

It begs the question... Neltharion himself, in person? Or another of his flight (Nefarian?)?!

And good catch with that 'lipless' and 'scaly lips' thing Very Happy. I totally missed that ^^.
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michellethemit



Joined: 10 Jan 2006
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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2007 8:25 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

there was a powerful, magical whirring,

Sorry, suppose that was unclear. That's how it appears in the chapter. What I was trying to get at is that most of what I've seen is that if you put 'whirr', that'd be in italics, but afaik, if it's in the form of 'whirring' it's not...that one I was really unsure about.

I've always gone by the whole 'if it sounds right, it is' way of learning English...I failed grammar horribly >.<
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michellethemit



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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2007 8:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Amaunator wrote:
You noticed the Prestor thing too? Very Happy

It begs the question... Neltharion himself, in person? Or another of his flight (Nefarian?)?!

And good catch with that 'lipless' and 'scaly lips' thing Very Happy. I totally missed that ^^.


Well, for all intents and purposes, Nef is dead. Onyxia is also dead, and was a lady while shapeshifted. Unless Albatros decides to bring the infamous dragon siblings back. But that definitely reeks of Black Dragonflight. If they're not plotting, they've definitely got their eye on the situation with Vari and all.
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Amaunator



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Location: Belgium ... innocuous but intrepid!

PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2007 9:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Bah, Onyxia and Nefarian dead ^^. What a joke! Very Happy

Deathwing was presumed dead as well... He hid himself and started anew in Outland. I'm sure Onyxia and Nefarian took after their father enough to flee their respective lairs in time, even if they were under assault 24/7 by players that are even more notoriously known for item-hoarding than the dragons themselves ^^.
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Saranus



Joined: 06 Sep 2005
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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2007 10:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

they both seemed pretty dead when their heads were impaled on spikes in orgrimmar. but it does reek of black dragonflight. what member of that flight might just be significant to the story??? um, i dunno. starts with a "T" ends with an "igole". Thats my prediction.
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Ulkarr



Joined: 23 Jul 2005
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 10, 2007 4:19 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

....seer of symbols....


These three words stood out for me the most. Purhaps the law is playing both sides?
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Amaunator



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PostPosted: Fri Aug 10, 2007 5:18 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ulkarr wrote:
....seer of symbols....


These three words stood out for me the most. Purhaps the law is playing both sides?


Hmm... That might of course not be far off! It would make sense, wouldn't it? If there is Law there must be Chaos, so why not guide both? Smile
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Aroka



Joined: 10 Aug 2007
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 10, 2007 1:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm really hoping that the Prestor guy is a Black Dragon. I don't care who but I think this will really throw a little twist into the story. And Horse has met Ysera? So I guess the Nightmare didn't win in the Dream after all. And who was that random elf girl in the Emerald Dream? She's gonna give Horse his wings now Smile. That's gonna be interesting.
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Amaunator



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PostPosted: Fri Aug 10, 2007 3:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Aroka wrote:
I'm really hoping that the Prestor guy is a Black Dragon. I don't care who but I think this will really throw a little twist into the story. And Horse has met Ysera? So I guess the Nightmare didn't win in the Dream after all. And who was that random elf girl in the Emerald Dream? She's gonna give Horse his wings now Smile. That's gonna be interesting.


I think that random elf girl is a green dragon... It's not Ysera, she was the one with the emerald eyes and hair, but any other green dragon might do. When dragonflights meddle with things, then those things are big ^^. We can only hold our breath and hope for more soon Very Happy.
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Farsider



Joined: 10 Aug 2005
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 10, 2007 10:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I thought that it was just a Nelf Druid who was asleep and Dreaming, like Malfurion for most of WoW. A green dragon probably makes a bit more sense, tho, maybe
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Aroka



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PostPosted: Fri Aug 10, 2007 11:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Amaunator wrote:
Aroka wrote:
I'm really hoping that the Prestor guy is a Black Dragon. I don't care who but I think this will really throw a little twist into the story. And Horse has met Ysera? So I guess the Nightmare didn't win in the Dream after all. And who was that random elf girl in the Emerald Dream? She's gonna give Horse his wings now Smile. That's gonna be interesting.


I think that random elf girl is a green dragon... It's not Ysera, she was the one with the emerald eyes and hair, but any other green dragon might do. When dragonflights meddle with things, then those things are big ^^. We can only hold our breath and hope for more soon Very Happy.
Yea that's who I met, pretty sure random Night Elf girl was just some random Druid.
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Heloly



Joined: 31 Jul 2005
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PostPosted: Fri Aug 10, 2007 11:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

That victory dance captured Fang completely. Awesome.
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Aidinthel



Joined: 13 Mar 2006
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PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2007 12:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Is it wrong that the image of a murloc dancing made me laugh?
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Heloly



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PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2007 1:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

No, Fang dancing is always funny.
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